A minor issue with new pub rules

I don’t have children.

That wasn’t by design. But then, my lack of offspring hasn’t left a gaping hole in my life, either.

It just is.

The thing is, despite not having any of my own, I do actually like kids — most of the time, and in limited numbers, at least.

But one of the great benefits of being childless is that I’ve never darkened the doorway of  Chuck E. Cheese’s — a record I hope to carry to my grave. And I couldn’t tell you with any certainty what happens inside a Go Bananas (I can only assume it’s terrifying).

They’re both wonderful establishments, I’ve no doubt, doing the one thing they’re built to do, which is to cater exclusively to rambunctious children.

But you know what’s not designed for kids?  A pub.

Which is why the provincial government’s recent announcement that children will be allowed to accompany their parents into public houses — the main function of which is to serve alcohol to patrons 19 and over —  came as a bit of a surprise.

Especially since, as far as I can tell, nobody was actually asking for this.

Far more people I know, at least, would rather the province follow the example of our American cousins and allow us to slip a bottle of chablis or a six pack of suds into the grocery cart next to the milk and bread.

But the closest the new rules come to that, is to allow separate liquor vendors to operate within grocery stores — which barely addresses the issue, considering there are very few supermarkets that don’t already have a liquor store within spitting distance.

I know I’m in good company in my complete lack of enthusiasm for the whole kids-in-bars scenario. It  is widely shared among my friends — the vast majority of whom are parents.

Heck, many of them see the local watering hole as the one place they can escape their own progeny for a couple hours, never mind dealing with somebody else’s miniature travelling circus.

When you pop by your local for a drink, do you really want a pint-sized patron guzzling juice from a sippy cup at the next table?

That’s assuming the little beggars are even sitting down.

There’s nothing more disruptive than a bored kid — and, let’s face it, few places are going to be as boring to a kid as a pub.

But for those of us who have left our clubbing years well behind us, the local pub has become the centre of our social life. It’s really the only place we can gather in the exclusive company of adults, regardless of the time of day.

And, really, why would parents want this change? Is it worth saving a few bucks on a babysitter to spend an hour or two drinking before strapping the kids into the back seat for the drive home?

Yes, children need to learn how to behave properly in public. But there are plenty of family-friendly establishments where they can be schooled in the social niceties.

When I’m craving a White Spot burger, it’s pretty well guaranteed that some little person will be tearing wildly into a Pirate Pak nearby. And I’m perfectly OK with that. I’m on their turf, after all.

But when it comes to my weekend outings to the local pub, I’d prefer those to remain like the rest of my life — blissfully child-free.

Just Posted

Body still inside Surrey building two days after fire due to structural concerns

RCMP, fire investigations delayed ‘until the site is declared safe’

OUR VIEW: Foreigners need to butt out of our elections

Canadians don’t need outsiders to tell us who to vote for

Game-worn rugby jerseys auctioned in Surrey club’s ‘Ruck for the Cure’ fundraiser

Benefit for cancer society at Sullivan Heights Park and Beaverlodge clubhouse Saturday

Surrey cop killer gets new parole conditions

Surrey RCMP Constable Roger Pierlet, 23, was shot dead on March 29, 1974

B.C.’s best wheelchair curling teams to compete in Cloverdale this winter

The province is home to some of the world’s most decorated wheelchair curlers

VIDEO: Is the stethoscope dying? High-tech options pose threat

World-renowned cardiologist believes the device is just a pair of ‘rubber tubes’

Beers on the job, smacking crotches: 10 police misconduct probes in B.C.

Recent report by the Office of the Police Complaint Commissioner highlights a number of investigations

Seizure of cannabis edibles, including mac-and-cheese, prompt warning from B.C. RCMP

Potato chips, cheesecake and candy infused with cannabis also seized back in August

B.C. parents sue city and province in 12-year-old daughter’s drowning at lake

Beverly Park drowned at Rotary Lake in Dawson Creek in August 2016

VIDEO: Chill with polar bears through an Arctic live cam

Cam reopens just ahead of Polar Bear Week

UPDATE: Charges pending after two teens pepper sprayed at Port Coquitlam high school

Mounties are still working to determine exactly how many youth were involved

Aquilini companies deny negligence in U.S. vineyard fire that killed two kids

Fire occurred at Red Mountain Vineyard, located in southeast Washington State

Former Kelowna Hells Angels associate could be deported, court rules

David Revell has lost his fight against deportation from Canada

Most Read