ZYTARUK: Biding our time for those four horsemen

A guy waving one of those “repent for the end is near” signs...

ZYTARUK: Biding our time for those four horsemen

So let it be written…

 

I was driving down King George Boulevard the other day, in Whalley where all the buildings are going up, up, up.

There was a huge man standing at the side of the road, wrapped inside a great big quilt that was more proportional to a tent than a blanket. He was outside a bank, talking to another guy. He seemed angry about something, I’m not sure.

Not far from him was a guy waving one of those “repent for the end is near” signs.

And further on down the road, while waiting for a red light to change, I watched this young woman, who had perhaps one of the most horrific cases of meth-face I’ve ever seen, wobble back and forth in front of my car. At least she was inside the crosswalk and not stumbling out into traffic.

A tattered Doritos bag was stuck in my grill. Not sure if it blew into there, or somebody had stuffed it there for safekeeping.

I went grocery shopping in Cedar Hills and was returning a shopping cart when another big guy who was heading into the store remarked that someone really should fix the parking lot pavement, which is badly pocked with pot holes, a common sight in Surrey.

“Yep,” I replied.

When I got home, I read an “Op-ed” written by Surrey’s mayor Linda Hepner. “Surrey is the place to be,” her piece began.

Later on, the television news aired a story about a crow getting hurt in a park in Vancouver.

The Sun had its version, under the headline “Canuck the Crow assaulted, injured at kids’ soccer game.”

I don’t know who had it first, the TV or the newspaper. According to the Sun’s story, the bird somehow has 38,000 followers on social media. I wonder if it knows.

The television news also had a gripping report on a festival of cat video lovers gathered, by the hundreds if not thousands, on a vast lawn, gazing with unwavering attention at a giant screen that showed one Internet video after another of cats dangling from stuff, trying to crawl into boxes and doing other cute antics. Some people in the crowd were dressed up like cats, or at least their faces were painted up in a feline way to mark the momentous occasion.

Dozing in my comfy chair, perhaps dreaming about cats but not very likely, I awoke to a CBC television “exclusive” that Trudeau plans to legalize pot by July 1, 2018.

That’ll be Canada Day, in case you don’t know it.

By morning, the story was everywhere. The Financial Post, Toronto Star, The Globe and Mail, and of course, VICE News, were on it.

Anyway, we’ll be able to have four plants per household, they say.

Considering the price of vegetables these days, that’s good news for many Canadian families I guess. More fibre, anyway.

 

So let it be done.

 

Tom Zytaruk is a staff writer with the Now. Email him at tom.zytaruk@thenownewspaper.com